Depression. IS. REAL.

I never thought depression was real until I lost people that I would have never imagined losing, EVER. IN. MY. LIFE....

#Youarenotalone

1. Have you ever felt alone? BUT you def weren't...

2. Have you felt like you were drowning because nothing positive kept happening? Just tragedy after tragedy NONSTOP...... OR when something good happens you aren't even happy about it....

3. Every single time something bad happens or when you lose someone close to you, a part of you dies with it or them. What's the point of being happy then? What is life if you don't have those that make you happy in it? What's the point then, right?

4. Have you just slept all day and it felt like you haven't slept AT ALL? Do you binge eat or not eat at all? Do you just randomly cry FOR NO APPARENT REASON? Do you feel sad MAJORITY of the time and no matter what you do YOU JUST CANT BE HAPPY...

5. Do you just want to be alone and just cry and scream? Do you ask yourself why you? Why did GOD take them away from me? or why did they have to do things that put them in bad situations that aren't irreversible?

6. Do you listen to certain songs and just cry because your heart breaks of the memories you had with them? Do you listen to the lyrics and you know that they apply to you and your current situation??

7. Do you just not care about your job or school? You have no motivation to do not one thing and instead are mad at the world for putting you in such a horrible situation? Do you release your anger on your loved ones even though they had nothing to do with certain situations?? But you do it anyway because you're just so heartbroken and beat that you are just tired of how you feel....

8. Do you feel like you want to give up sometimes? #DontDoIt

#SuicideHotline (1-800-273-8255)

9. Have you been so stressed out that you just want to escape somewhere and never come back ever....

10. Do you ever feel guilty for not spending enough time with them? Wish you were cheated of time? Do you wish you could of done more whenever they were alive? Did you take them for granted?

11. Do you feel that the pain never gets easier or even goes away? If anything it feels like it gets worse and it eats at you every single day until you suffocate?

#DepressionThoughts

#NegativeThoughts

Yeah........

I've been there....

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This has been the most difficult thing I have ever had to endure and overcome. All I can tell you is you got this. You will prevail. Pray to God to bring you peace and fill your heart with love instead of hate and nothing but sadness until it suffocates your happiness and motivation. Don't let it. You can overcome this darkness that has taken over you, I promise. If I can do it, so can you... with time and effort....

2020 has shown me to be grateful for those that are still in my life. To cherish my time with them as much as I can.. To make memories. Take pictures and videos to look back on whenever they aren't here anymore. It'll be worth it, I promise. It takes less than 5 seconds to take a picture or make a video...

It's been one very difficult journey for me to move forward. I've been beat to my core. I've been kicked constantly whenever I'm already on the ground. Trying to get up from the ground and being able to overcome the kicks and punches has been difficult but I'm doing it slowly but surely.

DON'T stay mad for long periods of time. Don't go to sleep mad. Don't leave the house mad at anyone or your spouse. Put your pride to the side and acknowledge your time is limited with certain people no matter how old they are. Let them know how much you truly love them and how much you appreciate and love their presence. Appreciate their time as much as you can. Please.

As the tears start to roll down my face remembering those that I lost this year, last year, 2017. I want you all to know y'all mean so much to me and I think and pray about you all every single day of my life. I will never forget any of you and will make sure your name lives on. You all won't be forgotten, ever.

#DepressionBlog

It's okay to seek counseling. Don't be embarrassed about speaking to a counselor. You MUST vent in order to move forward.

If this blog applies to you or someone that you know. Don't hesitate to reach out to me and vent. I'm hear to listen and never judge you. I will be keeping you in my prayers and remember......

You can do this and you got this. I believe in you. Don't say you can't do it because I know you can and YOU WILL. Believe in yourself. You WILL beat this depression you are experiencing, I promise you.

God Bless you!